Thirsty for More

I sit here eyes filled with tears.  Not sure if it's the pregnancy hormones, or the fact that I've always had a tender heart.  Dad and I always cried while watching Touched By An Angel and when my mom starts to tear up I quickly tell her to stop before I begin welling up.   Right now though my eyes are filled with tears because I just read a blog by a pastor who has blessed me in more ways than he'll ever know.  He brought life to God's word, he challenged me to challenge my relationship with God- to grow closer and deeper than I've ever dared to go before.   He restored a hurt in me that had been broken when I was young and never fully healed....just shoved under the rug.   As I read his blog I am again encouraged because for several weeks I've been missing the authentic and real way he makes me feel as though God is sitting in the room with me and speaking right to me.

His entry is about lying down in green pastures.   Oh is that something I can relate to.   I get so caught up in the worries and even dreams that will only last me a blink of an eye compared to eternity.   Why don't I focus more of my energy on the things that I will carry with me beyond this time on earth?   Lately, I don't spend a lot of time alone just to think, pray and read.   This entry he wrote just really made me stop in my tracks.   I feel like I've got God standing next to me saying, "stop....just stop".   In my Bible study this evening Beth Moore talked about Psalm 46:10 "Be still, and know that I am God." I can not really know him if I'm running around and never taking a moment to be still.

What a blessing this entry from Tim has been to me.   I miss his teaching and look forward to when I'll be able to listen to him again soon.   After you experience a teacher like Tim you realize how the most important thing in church is the message.   I really have to admit I've focused more on the paint color, music, coffee creamer, and how much the pastor can make me laugh in the past.  Now I am thirsty for the meat.   I want to hear the good stuff....the stuff that leaves me more and more satisfied in Christ each week.

I wish that the desires of our hearts would be to simply learn and grow in God's word.   I wish we did not get so focused on making Christianity "cool", "hip", "relevant".   It just needs to be real.   The fact is a church won't save you, the sweet coffee shop (although I love them just as much as anyone else) in the corner won't bring His word to life, the lighting, the music, or even the people that fill up the pews (more like soft cushiony chairs now) won't fill you with joy, hope, grace, love and peace.   What will though is the power God can bring through those who just ask him to be used.   The kind of worship that brings the man in the Harley jacket to his knees, the message that leaves you with a deeper understanding of God and makes you want to run home and dive into His word, or as I've heard a beautiful woman put, a pastor who teaches the word in such a way that brings color to the black and white image you've had of Jesus for so long.   The real and powerful presence of God in a space where He is welcome and His opinion is the only one that matters.   That is what will draw us in.   That is what leaves my heart overflowing with His spirit.