Close Call

When you receive a phone call and can hear the heart monitor beating in the back ground and your moms first words are, "He's ok, but..." your heart tends to begin sinking.  Last night I got that phone call after my brother had been in a snowboarding accident that left him unconcsious for over 5 minutes.  Thankfully, he is recovering well and there were no life threatening injuries, all because he was wearing his helmet!  I'm so proud that he is a responsible kid!

I just have to say my brother and I have one of those unspoken love kind of relationships.  Of course my mind went to, "When did I tell him I loved him last?  When did I give him a hug and tell him how awesome he is?"  The answer to both of those questions was, "too long."  I'm not sure he'd appreciate me gushing over him every day though.  By the off chance that he reads this someday I hope he can tell how much he means to me.   I wasn't always the best sister.  I am 7 years older than him and I sure picked on him a lot, ignored him a lot and tried to steal the lime light a lot.  I wish I could take back the sister I was when we were kids, but I hope I've somehow made up for it as I've grown out of my selfish ways.  He means the world to me and I could not be more thankful that he is my brother.  He is a great Uncle and I am really glad my little man is going to be able to look up to him because he will be a great role model.  He has made really good choices in life and I can only imagine what God has in store for his future.  My brother can make everyone laugh and he is total guy all the way through.  He can get through a store within 5 minutes (shopping line included) and there's no sense in talking to him about mushy stuff.

If you can't tell I love my brother....if you can't tell I love you bud.  I hope you know that and I pray you never wonder if that is true.

Hitting my knees

My boy is sick for the first time and this is not something I was prepared for.  He is so tiny and we can't do much to help him.  We get a cold and shove zycam up our nose or take a dose of tylonol.  I just have to watch him cough his way through it.  He looks up at me with his big brown eyes in desperation, as if to say, "mom, please help."  I'm not getting a lot of sleep because I'm checking to see if he's breathing, or I'm quickly sitting him up as he coughs.  The sleep can wait though.  It's just emotionally exhausting feeling so helpless.  I know every mother faces this time and I'm sure those of you who are reading this understand where I'm coming from, or wish I would stop whinning.  This all puts in perspective parents who have to watch their children go through very painful things (surgeries, illnesses, etc.).  I have much respect for them because I'm about to have a melt down over a cold.  I'm just saying I completely understand why my mom always looked like she was in more pain than I was everytime I was sick or hurt.  I'm guessing since I have a boy there will be many more sick nights, hospital visits and that desperate look in his eye.  I just never realized how hard it would be to be the strong one. 

Praying God makes this stuffy nose and cough go away.... 

My boy looks cute in hats!

I just LOVE these crochet hats!  He looks so handsome, dontcha think??? We got this one from Boise Butterfly

So many friends and family who love our boy

We have just been overwhelmed by the outpoor of love since we have been back!  Thank you to everyone who has come to love on Ryker, or sent a thoughtful card our way.  This has been such a fun time, but also an adjustment as we try to become parents.  It's very evident the importance of that quote, "It takes a villiage to raise a child,"  and I'll tell you what our child has a pretty amazing villiage.  Here's just a few....

Tips for those adopting out of state

While I had it on my mind I wanted to offer some tips to anyone who might end up adopting out of state.  There are so many tips for mothers bringing a baby home from the hospital, but I found it hard to figure out what to take while traveling and possibly staying in a hotel for 2 weeks. 

Here are some great things to take with you:
Madella Sanitizing bags - all you have to do is add water, add bottles/Binky's and zap in the microwave for 5 min.  Great way to keep things clean without a dishwasher!
Summer Swaddle Me blankets - Ryker loved these!  It helped him feel so secure and it was the only way he could sleep at night.  This was a neat way to imitate what he felt in the womb as I held him. 
Soft Washcloths-  We used these as burp rags as well as to give him a sponge bath.  We brought 10 of them and had to wash them half way through the trip there. 
Moby Wrap-  LOVE THIS!  We did some sight seeing and this was a great way to carry little man around without feeling tired.  It also kept strangers from coming up at touching him, or getting to close to him.  Not to mention the special feeling of him all snuggled up in my chest!  BEAUTIFUL!
Small notebook & folder- We used a notebook to keep track of his eating and diaper changing schedule, which you will need for the pediatrician.  We used the folder to keep all the medical and adoption records in, so they wouldn't get lost. 
3oz formula bottles-  We use Gerber Good Start formula and they carry 3oz glass bottles, which were awesome for when we were out and about and were perfect for traveling on the plane.  We were able to take them on our carry on bag and since they are sealed they don't have to be refrigerated. 

Last of all don't forget to bring a journal, or something to keep track of all those special moments you'll spend with your new little one.  There are so many emotions that ran through me and the time flew by.  I felt like I was living a dream and I'm so thankful I wrote things down otherwise I might have forgotten what day I was peed on for the first time :-)  Or when he spit up all down my back for the first time :-)  Or my favorite....when he turned toward my face when I spoke to him, looked up at me and grinned for the first time! 

Home just got a lot sweeter

Well we had a wonderful surprise yesterday!  Our paper work went through a lot quicker than we expected and we were given the go ahead to come back home :)  We had a wonderful time in Atlanta and made memories and friends to last a lifetime, but I just could not wait to get my boy home and introduce him to his new family.  When we landed on Boise's great soil this afternoon we were greeted by loving smiles....

Our immediate family met us back at our home for a wonderfully prepared dinner (by the new grandma's) and a night to just praise God for this beautiful baby boy!  Ryker is so loved, not only by us, but by many friends and family.  He is a lucky boy and I'm thankful for those in our life who have been praying for him and for us through this journey.  He couldn't be more perfect and I truly am the luckiest woman in the world to be his mom....wow I get teary eyed just saying those words.  I love him so deeply and he's already brought a tremendous amount of joy to Tyler and I. 

1/1/11 at 1pm

Once there were two women who never knew each other One you do not remember, the other you call Mother Two different lives shaped to make you one One became your guiding star, the other became your sun The first one gave you life, and the second taught you to live it The first gave you a need for love, the second was there to give it One gave you a nationality, the other gave you a name One gave you a talent, the other gave you aim One gave you emotions, the other calmed your fears One saw your first sweet smile, the other dried you tears One made an adoption plan, that was all that she could do The other prayed for a child, and God led her straight to you. Now, which of these two women, Are you the product of? Both, my darling, Both, Just two different types of love. ---- Unknown

Today we had lunch with little man's birthmom.  Of course we were nervous.  We didn't know what we would say or what to talk with her about.  I mean how do you thank someone for the beautiful child they chose to hand over to you?  How do you express how much you admire a 13 year old for keeping her baby, making a wise decision to give her baby a home with two parents and then to come meet you and spend time with you.  We met for lunch and when we walked in the door there was an instant sense of peace.  You could just tell God was in the room throughout the whole afternoon.  Their was so much thankfulness and gratitude both ways.  For us, it was what I said earlier and for them it was a sense of hope that this child would be cared for and that they could continue to focus towards goals any 13 year old should have.   His birthmom is so sweet and gorgeous.   He looks so much like her, especially when he gets a sweet smile on his face.   I'm so thankful I will be able to tell our son about the special girl who gave him life.